Well guys, it happened again.
Technically, a few things happened again I suppose-
i.e. I cracked another phone screen (this would be the 7th time)
I lost/broke some of my favorite jewelry.
Damaged another good dress...
And it’s all because I just can’t handle myself at weddings.
I don’t know what my problem is. I just really love receptions.
After much self reflection yesterday,
I’ve chalked it up the fact that most times I am just so honored/excited
to be invited in the first place, that I guess I just feel it’s my obligation
(as a good wedding guest)
to show the bride and groom that I am having the best time of my life.
I like to make them think it’s the first reception I’ve ever been to.
So with that said, I consider myself a pretty damn good wedding guest.
The wedding was held in Quechee, Vermont.
Talk about a little gem of a spot.
It was absolutely gorgeous, there was so much to do, and I was just fascinated by the
Boston accents-
“watta= water, chowda= chowder and wuka=worker.”
We went kayaking, I saw my first Polo match, did a little sightseeing,
and of course finished it all off by celebrating the wonderful bride and groom,
Stephanie and Ben.
And these two are about as cutely in love as it gets.
As I watched the ceremony unfold, I tried to take mental notes regarding
exactly how Steph was acting.
Because here’s the thing about me, for as much as love receptions,
ceremonies make me painfully uncomfortable.
I know this makes no sense, but I just feel like it’s such a personal moment, and because these types of things make me so socially awkward, I usually get embarrassed just watching it.
Thus the reason I thought Steph was a pro as all eyes were locked on her.
She was cool, calm and collected.
Where as I would be sweaty, panicky, and blushy.
She smiled and winked at Ben through out the entire exchanging of vows.
If I tried to smile and wink at the same time it would most likely look like I had tourettes.
She nodded at the right times and giggled when necessary.
I would most likely laugh when it was completely inappropriate,
and nod when I was supposed to speak.
I think you catch my drift. But who knows, maybe I could surprise myself and act perfectly well when that time should come… Doubtful though. Very doubtful.
Like everything else, the reception was just as beautiful.
Although my only disappointment was probably when we first walked into the tent and I saw the table décor consisted of lolli pops, taffy ropes and bubble gum, and I immediately thought,
“hells yea, a candy theme.”
Sadly, those were just the tables for the kids…
Flower centerpieces are pretty and all, but not nearly as entertaining as swirly lolli pops, if you ask me.
Other than that, the band was excellent and the wine was even better.
Naturally, I took full advantage of both.
And then the rest of the night went something like this:
Dancing. Drinking. Toasting.
Did I remember to eat dinner?
Wonder if I could scavenge up one of them lolli’s…
Must. Be. A. Fun. Wedding. Guest.
Drinking. Drinking. Dancing.
Dancing while drinking.
Bedtime.
When we went down for brunch the next morning I wore my usual
Sunday look of shame and tried not to make eye contact with anybody.
But then the father of the bride quickly approached me, as he just wanted to make sure I was okay after my “bad fall on the dance floor.”
Was I okay? Of course.
Besides the fact my knee cap was bruised, my elbow felt shattered, my hands were covered in tiny cuts, and my spine now felt about 30 degrees crooked.
But at least I knew now I wasn’t going to have to ask my parents at what point in the night did I get into a fight with a pack of wild coyotes…
Sorry for partying.
I swear I do it just for everyone else’s sake.
Sunday we finished out our vacay with a quick stop in the beach town of Hampton, New Hampshire.
Not to be confused with the Hamptons. I’ve been to the Hamptons.
And this one little (s) makes a lifetime of difference.
Hampton might be The Hamptons dirty tattooed, little step cousin, and that’s as close as they get.
The people are all slightly obese, which makes their tats seem even bigger,
and their lack of clothing does not go unnoticed.
But of course we still managed to have a good time, snacking on oysters on the half shell and calamari at a roof top beach bar.
It was a good spot for people watching judging.
And for the evening we went to York, Maine for some good ol’ Maine lobster.
Turns out I don’t really like lobster.
Or maybe I just don’t like it when it’s served to me in its full body suit.
I swear mine was still alive and all I could think about was Sebastian from Little Mermaid.
And when I opened it up and saw Sebastian was full of shit I was even more appalled.
From here on out I’ll just stick to my lobster bites from Long John Silver’s, thank you.
And that, my friends, was my weekend on the east coast.
Now only three more days until wedding fun #3 starts.
And did I mention I’m a bridesmaid this time around?
If you think I make a good wedding guest,
wail until you see what kind of Wedding Party Member I make.
