They Got Hitched- royal styley.

And it's done, they are married! What a wonderful event, I have been watching it all day and I simply can't get enough. The dresses, the hats, the fancy cars, it's all so exciting! A modern day fairy tale is what they're calling it. But for it to actually be a "modern day" fairy tale Kate would have to be Asian, William would be black, and their parents some sort of Hispanic Caucasian mix. That's how Disney likes to do it these days. And brother Harry would roll down the aisle in his wheelchair, his bright red hair definitely helps the cause though. But honestly I think Harry is devilishly good looking. I've had a secret crush on that guy since the day he was punished for being photographed partying in a Nazi costume. As I told my friend Sarah, not just any red head can pull off the swastika like he did. And boy oh boy is Kate's sister "Pippa" a hotty. Geesh. That was awfully brave of her to wear a white gown, as the Maid of Honor no less. That shit just wouldn't fly around here. I'm gonna have to consult the professional MOH Ashley Wergin and get her thoughts on this one. But between Kate, Pippa and their handsome little bro that family has some good genes. Wouldn't it just be oh so perfect if Harry and Pippa got together and had beautiful little ginger babies? Poor Willy definitely got the short side of the handsome stick. Too bad he couldn't have been fathered by his mom's man-mistress, as well.

Kate, I mean Katherine, looked absolutely stunning as I think everyone expected. Her dress was inspired by the great Grace Kelly and her body was inspired by the great Mary Kate Olsen. I did find the Wedding party to be a bit different... Besides Pippa the other bridesmaids were all under the age of eight. Is that how they do things over there? Or does Kate just prefer the company of children? I wonder what that bachelorette party would have been like. Sponge Bob lingerie perhaps? And I think I would feel kind of weird playing "put the condom on the twinkie" with a bunch of seven year olds. Not to mention wearing a penis sash. Shots all around for the bachelorette party woo hoo!

What I really want to see is the reception. Do Brits do all of the stupid wedding dances like we do here in Amurika? Will the queen be getting down to the Cha Cha or the electric slide? What about speeches? Harry strikes me as the type to be completey sloppy by the time his comes around. I could see him revealing all sorts of things he shouldn't about William's past and other ex girlfriends. And Pippa will be all drunk and depressed crying through out her speech that no matter what, her wedding, let alone her entire life, will never live up to sister Kate's.

I will admit, I was pretty jealous watching the entire event unfold. I know it might come as a shock, but I've never really been a "princess" kind of girl. When other little girls were dressing up as Snow White and Cinderella and going through the whole princess phase I was more caught up in wanting to be a bumble bee or a skunk. But today, I kind of wanted to be a princess. Ruling a country? I wouldn't hate it. Jade is hoping that Kate and Will have a daughter so "somehow Knox will meet her, date her, and then marry her so we can all go to the next wedding." And that's a direct quote. I can already see the headlines- "Princess Elizabeth the 8th to marry Nebraska boy Knox James Lafleur. The reception will be held at Memorial stadium at request of the groom's parents." Haha.

Alright, enough of this nonsense. It's Friday, I've got cocktails to drink and Rebecca Black to listen to... Oh wait, I guess that's not true. I actually have to pack my bags and head to the Overland Park Convention Center in an hour for a full weekend of culinary high school competitions. Loving life as a commoner here in Topeker.