Mean Girls

On October 3rd, he asked me what day it was.
Cady: It's October 3rd.


So if you haven't heard, today is National Mean Girls Day.
A day when we should celebrate all the bad bitches in our life.
Here's a tribute to all of mine:

Dear Post Office girls,
Why do you hate life so much?
I just want to buy some stamps, maybe mail a package,
and I think you just want to scowl from behind the counter and make people wait in line longer
only because you can....
Please cheer up.

Dear Girls who work at Platos Closet,
Your store is over flowing with Target clothes and Forever 21 shit,
so why do you turn away my nicer brand clothes that sometimes still even have the tags on?
I know it must feel good to say,
"We just couldn't take anything of yours but this one shoe lace. So here's 3 cents for it."
But I just don't think this is smart business sense.

Dear 7th Grade Girl from the School I was working in,
There's no need to be such little bitch. You're only 12. You've got a long life ahead of you with that attitude and those hoop earrings.
PS- your feather braid was so two years ago.

Dear 7th Grade Teacher from the school I was working in,
I don't understand why you were so short with me. I'm just trying to help your school.
You are not superior to me and therefore I found it rude when you talked down to me.
PS- your feather braid was so two years ago.

Dear Reception Girl at Hair Salon,
Why can't you just make it clear if the "do you want something to drink"
beverage is free or not? I get so confused and nervous and I can tell you're judging me.
I just don't want to pay $3 for a stupid drink...

Dear Yorky Bitch at the dog park,
Do not snap at Harlow one more time or I swear to God I will let him go after you.
Do you hear me, little girl? I won't hold him back next time.
You've nipped at him for far too long now.

Dear Teresa @ RHNJ,
You are as awful as Kim G. You're dead to me.
And if anyone truly thinks Caroline is a mean girl you cray cray.
Caroline is a tough girl. There's a big difference.

Dear Mean Girl from my High School,
Remember when you wrote on my locker basketball sign "orange face."
Yes, perhaps I was a bit tan for the month of January up in Northeast Nebraska,
but I still didn't think it was very nice.
And it was 2004. Orange skin was so in.

Dear Mean Girls who like to leave rude anonymous blog comments,
(and I'm not just talking about on my blog, I mean every blog)
Why do you do this?
Would you stay at a store you hated just to bitch about it to the owner?
Well you probably would.
But anyone else would just leave. So take note.
I'm sorry you're so unhappy with your own life you have to spread negativity,
but if you don't like what you read, leave. Find another blog.
There are plenty out there.

And to everyone else I have forgotten to mention,
Happy Mean Girls Day!
Don't get hit by a bus or anything.


You go Glen Coco.



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