Over the weekend two of my very closest friends got married.
I could not be happier for the both of them.
And even though I wasn't invited to the ceremony,
(it was very small)
or sent a text about it,
or a tweet,
or even a Facebook message,
I'm still totally happy for them.
So Blake and Ryan, if you happen to stumble across my page,
I just wanted to say congrats!
(my gift is on the way. Hint: it rhymes with bravy boat.)
And since you're here, I thought I might as well give you some relationship advice.
Blake,
marriage life isn't just a walk in the park.
I'm only telling you this because I know you've played the role of Blair Waldorf-Astoria
{clearly I don't watch, thanks Chelsea for telling me she actually played Serena}
for so long and I fear you might think life is as glamorous as it seems on Gossip Girl.
Life can get messy.
Especially in the bathroom.
You might come across times when one of you is doing yo business
while the other is taking a shower at the same time.
This happens in real life.
Then again, you two might be able to afford a home with more than one bathroom,
I don't know your exact financial situation so I'm just putting this out there in case.
I just know here in Chicago two bathrooms in one place is hard to come by...
And in case you haven't noticed, boys don't always get the shooting fountain in the pond
(if you catch my drift)
are you prepared to have to scrub this on occasion?
Here's a hint: Lysol Bleach Scrub is magic! Just spray it and walk the F away.
You'll thank me for this, Blakey.
What else what else... Oh yes, bills.
Bills bills bills. Something we all have to deal with.
Don't keep any unnecessary things plugged in!
I know most newlyweds are always trying to look for ways to conserve,
and this is a great way to cut down on the electricity bill!
Microwave, TVs, lamps, hell even the fridge from time to time,
there's no reason to be extravagant and keep all this stuff plugged in 24/7.
The other thing I wanted to mention might be a little touchy,
but I have to say it.
Please Blake, don't think that just because you're married you can let yourself go now.
We all saw you in The Town.... need I say more?
This means those traveling pants of yours need to go, as well.
There really is no reason to own a pair of pants that can be shared with
four different women of all different sizes, anyway.
I have two words for you: Scarlett Johansson.
And one movie title: He's Just Not That Into You.
If you think she's playing a part, you're kidding yourself.
Now Ryan,
please stay just the way you are.
Forever and ever.
Thank you.
And most importantly,
enjoy this fun time in your lives!
It's not often a young Hollywood couple falls in love so quickly and gets married even quicker
...er...
PS- I am so very excited to be guest blogging on one of my favorite blogs today!
I've literally been anxiously awaiting this moment when I got to take over her blog.
I'm talking about Steph at the Beautiful Mess.
In case you don't already read her blog, but I'm pretty sure everyone already does,
head over there right now!!!
PSS- I'm also a part of like a 100 person group giveaway on
Aunie's awesome blog at Aunie Sauce.
It's not really 100 people, but there is a lot of good loot going on.
So get there too.
I could not be happier for the both of them.
And even though I wasn't invited to the ceremony,
(it was very small)
or sent a text about it,
or a tweet,
or even a Facebook message,
I'm still totally happy for them.
So Blake and Ryan, if you happen to stumble across my page,
I just wanted to say congrats!
(my gift is on the way. Hint: it rhymes with bravy boat.)
And since you're here, I thought I might as well give you some relationship advice.
Blake,
marriage life isn't just a walk in the park.
I'm only telling you this because I know you've played the role of Blair Waldorf-Astoria
{clearly I don't watch, thanks Chelsea for telling me she actually played Serena}
for so long and I fear you might think life is as glamorous as it seems on Gossip Girl.
Life can get messy.
Especially in the bathroom.
You might come across times when one of you is doing yo business
while the other is taking a shower at the same time.
This happens in real life.
Then again, you two might be able to afford a home with more than one bathroom,
I don't know your exact financial situation so I'm just putting this out there in case.
I just know here in Chicago two bathrooms in one place is hard to come by...
And in case you haven't noticed, boys don't always get the shooting fountain in the pond
(if you catch my drift)
are you prepared to have to scrub this on occasion?
Here's a hint: Lysol Bleach Scrub is magic! Just spray it and walk the F away.
You'll thank me for this, Blakey.
What else what else... Oh yes, bills.
Bills bills bills. Something we all have to deal with.
Don't keep any unnecessary things plugged in!
I know most newlyweds are always trying to look for ways to conserve,
and this is a great way to cut down on the electricity bill!
Microwave, TVs, lamps, hell even the fridge from time to time,
there's no reason to be extravagant and keep all this stuff plugged in 24/7.
The other thing I wanted to mention might be a little touchy,
but I have to say it.
Please Blake, don't think that just because you're married you can let yourself go now.
We all saw you in The Town.... need I say more?
There really is no reason to own a pair of pants that can be shared with
four different women of all different sizes, anyway.
I have two words for you: Scarlett Johansson.
And one movie title: He's Just Not That Into You.
If you think she's playing a part, you're kidding yourself.
Now Ryan,
please stay just the way you are.
Forever and ever.
Thank you.
And most importantly,
enjoy this fun time in your lives!
It's not often a young Hollywood couple falls in love so quickly and gets married even quicker
...er...
PS- I am so very excited to be guest blogging on one of my favorite blogs today!
I've literally been anxiously awaiting this moment when I got to take over her blog.
I'm talking about Steph at the Beautiful Mess.
In case you don't already read her blog, but I'm pretty sure everyone already does,
head over there right now!!!
PSS- I'm also a part of like a 100 person group giveaway on
Aunie's awesome blog at Aunie Sauce.
It's not really 100 people, but there is a lot of good loot going on.
So get there too.
