So something weird happened last night.
I'm not sure if it was a dream, or real, or if I had just spent too many hours on Facebook.
But I was awoke in the middle of the night by something really creepy.
It smelled like alcohol and ignorance, its tone was naive but arrogant,
and it was dressed like a skanky Native American who had rolled in some pizza sauce.
It was the Ghost of my Halloween Past.
And with her smudgy blacked lined eyes, she insisted I take a walk with her down memory lane.
I tried to resist, but she threatened to pour cheap vodka down my throat if I didn't.
Like Bartons. Woof.
So I had no choice.
I was reminded of things I wish I could forget.
Like the time I went as a cat and actually wore a collar around my neck...
She told me I only spoke in "meow" by the end of that night. That's still up for debate.
But at least my hair looked good.
Crimped hair was, and always will be, my favorite hair style.
And that same year there was the hippy costume.
Although, I'd call it more of a bathing suit.
That dress was wayyyy too short to wear out in public.
She said I broke my phone this night. I told her flip phones couldn't break.
Ugh.
And of course I had to visit the night I wore a toga out.
As if the toga wasn't bad enough, I was forced to look at myself from behind
and notice I also had the infamous Jessica Simpson hair extensions in...
And then just to be a real bitch she even took me to this day-
At which point I responded- Hey that's not fair, this wasn't even Halloween.
and Ghost responded-
Oh it isn't, then why the hell are you dressed like this?
Point taken Ghost, point taken.
(High waisted shorts were popular for 7 seconds, and by golly I jumped on them.)
We visited a few more embarrassing nights, I learned a few more lessons,
and the next thing I knew I was back at home.
So what am I supposed to make of all this?
....
I think I'm supposed to save Tiny Tim and start crimping my hair again.
Oh, and I guess I no longer care I didn't "do" Halloween this year.
I think I had plenty of fun in the past.
Unless of course something strikes my fancy tomorrow night...
But it's going to have to be pretty great to get me away from Wednesday night TV,
a glass of wine, and my good pumpkin scented candle.
I'm not sure if it was a dream, or real, or if I had just spent too many hours on Facebook.
But I was awoke in the middle of the night by something really creepy.
It smelled like alcohol and ignorance, its tone was naive but arrogant,
and it was dressed like a skanky Native American who had rolled in some pizza sauce.
It was the Ghost of my Halloween Past.
And with her smudgy blacked lined eyes, she insisted I take a walk with her down memory lane.
I tried to resist, but she threatened to pour cheap vodka down my throat if I didn't.
Like Bartons. Woof.
So I had no choice.
I was reminded of things I wish I could forget.
Like the time I went as a cat and actually wore a collar around my neck...
She told me I only spoke in "meow" by the end of that night. That's still up for debate.
But at least my hair looked good.
Crimped hair was, and always will be, my favorite hair style.
And that same year there was the hippy costume.
Although, I'd call it more of a bathing suit.
That dress was wayyyy too short to wear out in public.
She said I broke my phone this night. I told her flip phones couldn't break.
Ugh.
And of course I had to visit the night I wore a toga out.
As if the toga wasn't bad enough, I was forced to look at myself from behind
and notice I also had the infamous Jessica Simpson hair extensions in...
And then just to be a real bitch she even took me to this day-
At which point I responded- Hey that's not fair, this wasn't even Halloween.
and Ghost responded-
Oh it isn't, then why the hell are you dressed like this?
Point taken Ghost, point taken.
(High waisted shorts were popular for 7 seconds, and by golly I jumped on them.)
We visited a few more embarrassing nights, I learned a few more lessons,
and the next thing I knew I was back at home.
So what am I supposed to make of all this?
....
I think I'm supposed to save Tiny Tim and start crimping my hair again.
Oh, and I guess I no longer care I didn't "do" Halloween this year.
I think I had plenty of fun in the past.
Unless of course something strikes my fancy tomorrow night...
But it's going to have to be pretty great to get me away from Wednesday night TV,
a glass of wine, and my good pumpkin scented candle.
