A Letter of Apology
Dear Kate and Will,
I am so embarrassed for forgetting about your one year anniversary.
I didn't even send a card, or wish you happy anniversary on Facebook, or even tweet it
and I just hate myself for it.
and I just hate myself for it.
Please forgive me and don't think of me as Princess Beatrice or anything.
Oh God, anything but that.
Regardless,
I just wanted to touch base and see how everything went for you this past year.
I know the first year is such a transition and things can be kind of tough-
I'm not married, but when I moved in with my boyfriend Chris
(of 4.5 years so spare me the judgement, Queen Elizabeth)
(of 4.5 years so spare me the judgement, Queen Elizabeth)
We bickered over lots of silly things at first.
Like which hand-me-down pots and plates we were going to use- Chris's or mine.
And why was I putting all of Chris's decorations in the office rather than in the living room where all of mine went.
And who got to use the covered parking spot in our apartment facility.
Why was the electricity bill so expensive?
Or why were we getting evicted from our apartment for not telling the owners we got a dog.
Standard stuff, really. I'm sure you went through all of this and more probably.
But that's the fun of it, right?
Speaking of dogs though, how is your little pup doing?
Bet you weren't prepared to start picking up her poop five times a day, huh?
Yea, you'll get used to it.
The plastic poop bags go fast though.
You know I could send you some Wal Mart ones, I mean if you need them.
We've got an entire collection in our pantry. Just putting it out there.
Anyway,
maintaining a strong relationship is hard to do,
especially when dealing with the pressures of every day life.
Bills, and in-laws, and jobs, and lack of jobs, and toilet seats left up. It's all part of the adventure of life.
So don't get hard on yourself if you and Will fight from time to time, it's completely normal!
You guys are a great couple, don't dwell on the small things.
Like I always say,
"Shit is best put in a plastic bag, don't let it just hang around."
Feel free to borrow that quote for a speech or something if you'd like,
just make sure to source me on it.
Again, congrats on a great year!
and on not gaining any newlywed weight. What's your secret?
Do you have the photo of Pippa from your wedding hanging on your fridge or something?
(because i do.)
Wishing you all the best,
XOXO
besties for life.
PS Kate-
If you'd like a copy of my ironic children's book "A Bottle For You. A Bottle For Me." I'd be happy to send you one (with a discount even.)
I feel like you'd really like it. And the queen would get a kick out of it. Text me.
Anyway,
maintaining a strong relationship is hard to do,
especially when dealing with the pressures of every day life.
Bills, and in-laws, and jobs, and lack of jobs, and toilet seats left up. It's all part of the adventure of life.
So don't get hard on yourself if you and Will fight from time to time, it's completely normal!
You guys are a great couple, don't dwell on the small things.
Like I always say,
"Shit is best put in a plastic bag, don't let it just hang around."
Feel free to borrow that quote for a speech or something if you'd like,
just make sure to source me on it.
Again, congrats on a great year!
and on not gaining any newlywed weight. What's your secret?
Do you have the photo of Pippa from your wedding hanging on your fridge or something?
(because i do.)
Wishing you all the best,
XOXO
besties for life.
PS Kate-
If you'd like a copy of my ironic children's book "A Bottle For You. A Bottle For Me." I'd be happy to send you one (with a discount even.)
I feel like you'd really like it. And the queen would get a kick out of it. Text me.
