Meet Fat Tuesday.

I like Fat Tuesday. I don't really get what it is, or what I'm supposed to do, but I'm pretty sure I like it. I celebrate Fat Sunday every week so how bad could it be to toss another into the mix.

I like to think of Fat Tuesday as a big fat jolly person who just likes to party. Like Chris Farley or John Belushi (RIP).

Fat Tuesday is always red in the face even when no one else is hot, sweaty when everyone else is cold.

Fat Tuesday doesn't have a neck for necklaces, but you can't tell because he wears his beard long and free.

And yet he'll still be the one with the most beads at the end of the night.

Fat Tuesday spills all over himself, regularly. But he's cool being the shirt-less guy.

Fat Tuesday doesn't say "let's party." He just does.

Fat Tuesday texts you at 9:00 a.m. and says "where are we drinking tonight." 

Fat Tuesday does not get hangovers, doesn't even know what the word means actually.

Fat Tuesday doesn't try to be funny, he just is.

Fat Tuesday thinks the movie Precious is about an aspiring model.

And he hates Kenan Thompson.

But he loves Ham Porter.

Alright, well you've met my Fat Tuesday. Hope you enjoy your own Fat Tuesday this evening whatever you're up to.