Bachelor Edition- Finale!

Oh what a season. "The most dramatic season ever?" No, probs not. Will America be talking about who Jake chose "for months to come" as Chris Harrison said, doubtful. As soon as Rozlyn's sex tape is officially released people will forget Jake or V even existed. We probably won't forget the way Jake cried at the end or told Ten that he'll never forget her. I'm gonna guess that if I were ever on a reality love television show only one time in my life I would probably remember the last two people, as well- doesn't exactly strike me as a huge deal.
First things first though, we all now know why Jake cries constantly. Call me crazy but I didn't gag when his little dad teared up, it just seemed way more genuine than Pilot Jakeys tears. And correct me if I'm wrong, but is he from a family of gingers? And is his sister Betty Boop's red headed twin? Second of all Tenley (Tynley- spelling? get a normal name)was just as cute as a button meeting his family. I want her to meet my parents. Sadly, ABC is so predictable, so as soon as we saw them setting it up that Jake's fam loved Ten, and hated V we all knew what we had been refusing to admit to ourselves. Jake goes with his dirty side. He chose a girl that he can "get rough with," which means he can push Vienna in a pool when she is sitting on the side, because that is how he gets rowdy. And we can all be sure that she will be sitting on the side of the pool in her green swimsuit. But anyway, it's cute how snatchy girls are, young or old. His mom and sisters decided almost immediately they weren't going to like Vienna. But I honestly don't think I ever saw his dad talk, is he a mute? Seriously, I just saw him cry and that was it. I'm going to bet that Jake's family is still pissed he chose Vienna. Guarantee she makes him go to her family events and never lets him see his family. And by family events I mean Nascar races, parking lot carnivals, just standard events. But speaking of Vienna's family, I counted how many times her dad was mentioned in the last episode- 78. Even right at the very end, Jake hands back the promise ring from daddy because he knows that he would probably be shot if he walked into her home wearing that ring on his hand. I'll be suprised if those two aren't pregnant before summer, I mean Vienna and her dad, by the way. And hopefully Tenley will have settled into the Duggar residence by then, maybe even pregnant herself. Only time will tell. All I know is that I truly hope and pray that by the next time The Bachelor rolls around my life will even be just an ounce more exciting so I do not have the time/interest to watch every single stupid episode. I need to devote myself to more important things- like Dancing with the Stars!!!! Erin Andrews? Hells yes. Kate Gosselin! Even more. I've even heard rumors Kate is giving her babies up for adoption, she even considered dropping them off at a Nebraska hospital on account of that safe haven law. I mean why not, who needs 8 kids when you have the chance to be on Dancing With the Stars? The woman has her priorities in check. So that's that.

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