Angry Badgers.

It's 6:30 a.m. and I'm wide awake and ready to go. I thought I drank enough to be able to sleep on the pull-out couch adjacent to my snoring parents and brother, but I was sorely wrong. Jordan literally sounds like he is moving a china hutch on steady intervals of three seconds, my mom is making the noises of a dying Yeti, and my dad is doing the choking-snore, where every so often he seems to wake himself up caught on a large gasp of air trapped in his throat.  I'm dying a slow death here at the Madison Hyatt.

So let me paint you a picture of last night. Imagine downtown Lincoln on a gameday weekend, crawling with, well, not Nebraska people.  That's basically what it's is like in Madison this weekend. And those little badgers are pissed. That's an understatement even. I've never seen a more bitter group of people stomping around, throwing tantrums like a bunch a of five year olds. Every bar last night was absolutely packed with Husker fans. And as more Nebraskys snuck their way in, more and more Wisconsin people sulked out saying things like, "this is such bull shit," and "this place is way too full of Nebraska people." You're preaching to the choir, bitch. Now step aside so we can get in. Wisconsin people were definitely in the minority every place we went, and they were hating it. They wore resentment on their face like a fat ingrown hair. It was great. But I tried to remain polite, I mean imagine if you went to the Rail or the Bar and it was packed with outsiders. And not just GDIs, but full of like Mizzou fans. Oh wait, that would never actually happen in Nebraska. Sucks to suck.

The best part is that Wisconsin girls are painfully ugly. No joke. I felt like I had died and gone to Topeka. At one point I actually looked around for Mark Wahlberg, because I was certain I was surrounded by every one of his sisters from The Fighter. I'm not going to deny that I'm starting to settle into my winter skin a little earlier than I had hoped. But last night I might as well have been Brooklyn Decker walking around. I'm not claiming to be something I'm not, that's just how unfortunate looking the females are around here. Us Nebraska girls stood out in every bar like a brunette in Norfolk. It was a real self esteem booster.

As the night progressed things got uglier (literally and figuratively.) More people came around that looked like they'd just crawled from the woodworks to get a look at all of us glitzy Nebraska fans, that may be the first and last time I refer to Nebraska fans as "glitzy." The badger fans were starting to get nastier and taunting us a little heavier. "Yeah, you better enjoy tonight because tomorrow's going to be hell for you." Thanks for the advice, we'll make sure to do that.

And so "tomorrow" has arrived. D day is here. In less than twelve hours it will all be underway. It's time for a bloody and it's time for some college football. And it's also time for me to put a pillow over Jordan's face and bless it with a cross because the noises coming from his mouth have turned satanic.

Happy game day from Madison, Wisconsin.