Bachelor Edition- "We're losing the sun, but gaining the moon."

If I could take three things on a deserted island with me I would bring a picnic lunch, champagne, and Emily. This is how Brad asked Emily on their one on one, but the weird part is that these are the exact three things I would bring on a deserted island with me, as well.

So on this specific one on one date Brad got extra ballsy and broke the rules! He's such a dare devil that one, he told Emily, before the rose ceremony I might add, that she was definitely going to get a rose. And she blushed and cooed but still didn't give into his request of meeting her daughter. Now I think Brad was getting just a little bit pushy. Why does he think he has the right to meet Ricky? Not just anyone gets this opportunity, so I think he was definitely in the wrong by pushing Emmers when she clearly isn't ready. She said it herself, "in her heart of hearts," she has to make absolutely sure it's right before she introduces her daughter to another man. Okay, so cool it Brad. This isn't Teen Mom, even Macy waited forever and it was still too early for Bentley to meet her boyfriend the Michelin Man when she finally introduced them. We don't need another Bentley/Macy situation on our orange hands here. But side note, what would we think about Ryan being the next Bachelor??? In the words of Facebook, like!like!like!

Brad and Brittany were a weird couple from the start. Did anyone ever hear this girl say more than two words? I still can't believe she made it as long as she did only to get sent home on a date where it wasn't necessary to even send someone home. Ouch, harsh move Brad. Back home to Auschwitz she goes...

So then Brad takes Shawtelly or as Kim calls her, "Funeral Bitch", on a super fun town date. I did find some of the activities they were doing to be a bit odd though. Chess with the locals? I can't help but wonder if another plan fell through or something. Like the airplane they were going to take to go cliff diving broke down perhaps. But it didn't matter, because as Shawtuza put it, "farmers markets make her trip..." She said it, not me. Sure, I think farmers markets are a hoot, but I don't think I would ever say they get me high, or make me buzz or anything. But to each their own. Just like the Native American eagle tattoo that was spread across her entire lower back side we got a peak of last night, to each their own.

And then we went on to one of the "most stressful days of Brad's life," a group date with Ashley, Chantal, and Michelle. Ashley is cute as a button, if she was in a sorority she would be the rush chair because she is just so bubbly and happy, and I can tell probably talks a lot of shit behind peoples back when the cameras are off. But it doesn't matter, everybody still loves her. I really wonder why she's on this show, however. She's a dentist, so she's obviously smart, and as I already said she's pretty cute. So why does she need to go on a reality show to find love? Skeletons in the closet? I'm gonna go with yes. Now Michelle and Chantal... Don't hate me for saying this, but I am pretty sure they are both pregnant. Three or four months along by the looks of it. I'm going to start writing some hate letters if ABC doesn't crack down soon and stop letting their pregnant contestants drink booze all of the time, it's disgusting. What was that green drink they were all drinking, anyway? My first thought was Beetle Juice, did anyone else have this juice growing up? Or was it just a Norfolk thing? Whatever it was it looked like it caused some major stomach bloat. Was I sad when Chantal cried because she was upset she didn't get a rose in the group date? A little bit, nobody ever likes to see an old Bar maid cry. But isn't she the one that wins in the end? Let's be honest, we've all heard the rumors that someone named Chan-Shaw-tel-tal wins, but which one is it? Funeral girl or pregnant Bartender?

I was slightly dissapointed Michelle was sent home just because I was interested to see what kind of parents raised such an awful human being. Oh well, guess I'll just have to watch Kate Gosselin next week instead.

And now we are down to the final four. How exciting.